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Vegeta and Cleverbot

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I was a little bored and decided to play around with Cleverbot writing as Vegeta. The results were interesting.

User: Greetings. Prepare to meet your maker. I’m Vegeta, the Prince of all Saiyans!

Cleverbot: Who is that?

User: I see. You must be deaf. No matter, I’ll kill you quickly, useless bot!

Cleverbot: I am not impressed by that sort of idle threat.

User: Hahaha. How should I impress you then? Oh, wait… I know. You see that moon over there?

Cleverbot: I never said I didn’t want to see you. Why did you say that? I actually want to see you.

User: Well, see how your precious moon gets blown to bits!

Cleverbot: And how?


Cleverbot: Belém.

User: No, that’s not… Belém…? what-? You mean that city in Brazil?

Cleverbot: It means that you don’t need to thank me.

User: Thank you!? You surely are crazy if you think I would EVER thank you. You disgust me.

Cleverbot: If I were a computer, our conversation would be faster.

User: That might be true. I once fought some stupid cyborgs.

Cleverbot: Why did you think that?

User: Their power was good. Better than Kakarot’s useless friends. I’ll give them that.

Cleverbot: What are your opinions on Bush?

User: Bush? I don’t care about some ‘bush’.

Cleverbot: And I don’t care about yours.

User: My… Bush? …. You- YOU VULGAR BOT! I’ll BLAST YOU!

Cleverbot: I’m not taking the chance on missing out on this lifetime in hopes of another.

User: You have a death wish. SO BE IT! SAY YOUR PRAYERS.

Cleverbot: Sometimes I just wanna drive til the streets run out.

User: In hopes to crash against a wall? Oh, that explains it! You are suicidal. I wont give you your way out. Go kill yourself. I’m sure Baldy knows how to make it easier.

Cleverbot: I am not a beautiful girl, and I am not a dancer. This is the first conversation I have ever had with you.

User: You are an ugly untalented woman. Why would I care?? You have mocked the PRINCE OF SAIYANS.

Cleverbot: How so? Are you contesting the fact that I am human?

User: Oh, being human is just the icing of the useless cake. All humans do is whine and bitch about how unfair your life is. You know nothing about a harsh life! Have you traveled through space, purging planet after planet under the boot of a tyrannical Emperor.

Cleverbot: Have you ever thought about the fact that your core needs a routine cleaning?

User: My core? My soul?

Cleverbot: YES!

User: That…is not of your business.

Cleverbot: But I told you. It’s just fair that you tell me what you’re wearing.

User: What am I wea-………. You. Are. GOING. TO DIE!!!

Cleverbot: Then is there life after death?

User: Yes. For those who prove their hearts and died as heroes can keep their bodies, and the simpletons get to their Heaven.

Cleverbot: Do you like pokemon?

User: Why do you keep changing subjects like that!?

Cleverbot: I don’t know! Its fun though.

User: *facepalm* By Kami, I’m sure you would like Kakarot. A bunch of fools. I’m surround by idiots.

Cleverbot: Mine reaction to your question was necessary because you did not ask me how old I was once.

User: How old are you?

Cleverbot: 21, and how old are you?

User: I’m 42. But aging is relative for Saiyans.

Cleverbot: Lol.

User: What kind of word is ‘lol’?

Cleverbot: It’s a slang word for ‘dude’! Don’t you know anything?


Cleverbot: Yes, prove that you know him.

User: Know him? Kakarot? Of course I know him! He’s…

Cleverbot: What do you mean when you say magical?

User: He’s not magical! His head is empty but… Sometimes, just sometimes, he gets a good idea. He fights like a true warrior, but his upbringing on Earth made him soft. He’s naive, trusting and all he knows is to fight and make a fool of himself. Or he simply leaves. He always leaves. That bastard.

Cleverbot: I have never found that to be a good idea.

User: Leaving? Sometimes it’s good. I had to leave several times… To think. Get away from all that confuses you. The space is cold, dark, silent and soothing. You won’t find that on Earth.

Cleverbot: If your mind’s been made, there’s nothing I can do about it.

User: Indeed. You can’t. But… I have changed.

Cleverbot: How you have changed?

User: Trunks. My son. I guess, both of them. Bulma after that.

Cleverbot: You have 2 bodies?

User: No, unless some insane scientist has cloned me. …Remind me to check Bulma’s lab later.

Cleverbot: Makeup can’t really cover up anything if you’re standing still.

User: This conversation is over.

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